How to talk to your EGO? | Day 4
Todays Aim- to have an effective conversation with your ego.
When your ego pops up and tells you that you're rubbish, an idiot or that you don't deserve the things you have. What do you say back to it? How do you react? Do you shout back at it? Tell it to 'leave me alone'? or do you try to ignore it? Do you let its words seep in and do you begin to believe them as fact?
Seeing as you have been working on your awareness and are now starting to recognise your ego, you can also change how you respond to what your ego says to you. And i thought the best thing to do was to write a letter. (White chicks style) I have made a general letter below as an example, making sure to acknowledge my ego and stating clearly what it can and cannot do.
Use the worksheet here to write your own letter. You can write a general one like mine, or you can be more specific.
Dear Mr E,
Awareness and I are going on a road trip together. I understand that you will also be tagging along because you always do. I acknowledge that you believe you have an important role in my life and that you take your job seriously. Apparently, your job is to induce complete panic whenever I’m about to do something interesting- and may i say that you are superb at it. So by all means, keep doing it, if you feel you must. But i will also be doing my own job on this trip, which is to work with awareness and stay focused on the present. There is plenty of room in the vehicle for all of us, so make yourself comfortable, but understand this: Awareness and I are the only ones who will be making any decisions along the way. I recognise and respect that you are a part of this family, so I will never exclude you from our activities if you want to join in. However, there will be no snacks or fizzy drinks allowed for you to fuel up on as I know how messy you are when you get hungry. I also want to prevent a hyper Mr E. You are allowed to have a seat and a voice, but you are not allowed to have a vote. You are not allowed to touch the GPS, suggest shortcuts, fiddle with the temperature. You're not even allowed to touch the radio or connect your phone up to Bluetooth. But above all, my dear old familiar friend, you are forbidden to drive.
Take it or leave it, it is up to you,
With gratitude, clarity and complete seriousness.
An extra tip for an in the moment criticism from your ego is to just accept the thought. Stop yourself from getting into an argument, debate or allowing it to drone on and cause you to feel worse. Literally say 'I have heard your comment, but I am choosing to not act on it or let it hurt me'
The final day, day 5 will give you a strategy for hearing your ego's comments and then working through them.